Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
