We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
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