At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Randomize
