and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
I would ride that face into the sunset
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
