i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Randomize
