I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
Randomize