called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Randomize
