I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
Randomize
