hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Randomize
