...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
It's shark week go big or go home
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
