When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
