Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
Randomize
