i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize