you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
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