I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Randomize
