He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
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