my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
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