No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
Randomize