well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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