I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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