Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
