Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
Randomize
