Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
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