i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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