Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
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