she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
Randomize
