Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Randomize
