I hope mine doesn't look like that
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
