found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
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