I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
What a dumb baby whore.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
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