hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
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