Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
