so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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