How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Randomize
