If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Randomize
