You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
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