Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
I queefed so loud it echoed.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
Randomize
