Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Ladies, if you have recieved this text then you are one of the lucky few friends I have decided to make this proposal to. As you all know, my boyfriend's birthday is in two weeks and I have finally decided on the perfect present. Surprise threesome. Now, there can only be one, this isn't an orgy you know, so I will be rating the ideal candidates on bra size and sluttyness. Experiance will count, references if available. Inbox me your credentials so we can come to a...Satisfying agreement.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Randomize
