; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
Randomize
