It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
