she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Randomize
