Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize