Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
