the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
Randomize
