omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
