Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
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