I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
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We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
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I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
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