like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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