whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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