It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
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