Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
