I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
